The way kids think

Last night at dinner Megan was asking me why Daddy had to work late. I explained to her that he had to take a phone call from someone who was in a different time zone - which of course led to the next obvious question from her. "What's a time zone?" I began explaining what it was and how it worked to which she replied that it all sounded a little silly.

So I decided to make it a bit more interesting and told her how her cousin in Japan was already waking up on Friday morning even though we were only eating dinner here on Thursday. Her eyes got big, she laughed and said, "now that's just freaky!"

Matt isn't much better these days and seems to constantly be asking "why?" to anything he possible can. (I thought that was a 2 year old stage - not something a 4 year goes through.) I appreciate that he's simply trying to comprehend the big world around him but I have to admit that it drives me up the wall a lot of the time. Mostly because the "why's" seem to be an automatic conversation reflex after a while and not really a legitimate question. But then there are times when he simply cracks me up with his simplistic logic behind what can be a complex issue for a 4 year old.

For example; this morning Matt found one of our cats in the backyard torturing a squirrel. From what I could tell, the squirrel had a broken back or something as it dragged itself away from Gipper. And as Matt watched, Gipper batted the squirrel around a bit more and then finally grabbed it by the throat and rag-dolled it a bit. The questions from Matt just came rolling out about why Gipper would do such a thing. I didn't want to pretend that the cat was just "playing" because, hey, you can't coddle your children forever. But I also didn't want to play out the slaying of the creature with too much drama and end up scarring his little brain forever. He seemed satisfied with my answers at first until he finally said, "why can't he just eat his own food instead of eating squirrels and mice?"

My response was that Gipper is an animal and that's just what some animals do. To which he replied, "Gipper's not an animal!"

Ok, so now how do you explain that an animal is a creature and not what we refer to he and his sister as when they are acting crazy? (And I knew for a fact that my answer would lead to the next question of what is a creature?) So I explained it by saying, why don't you ask your Daddy.

(Hey, I'm home with the kid all day, every day now. You can't expect Daddy to get out of answering some of these important questions!)

Pregnancy

I've recently been surrounded by a lot of pregnancy 'issues' so I thought I'd share.

First of all, I've been going through every piece of maternity clothing, baby clothing, baby furniture and gadgets, etc. that Robert has outgrown and have been handing it all down to my niece to be stored away until she and her hubby are ready to procreate. And it reminded me of just how much stuff one little kid uses. The day that she stopped by the house to pick up the items that I had ready for her was an eye opener for both of us. The shocked look on her face as I continued to hand her box after box of baby clothing was classic. It was the look of someone who hasn't been in this position yet and is completely unaware of just how quickly and easily a child will "over run" their household. She asked that I only save clothing up until about 18 months as she felt that would be adequate.

Having been there, I think I'll save up to 24 months. The kids grow so fast in the first two years that before you know it, another season has changed, and your child just outgrew everything in the previous size. It's nice to have the clothes as backup until those growth spurts slow down a bit and clothing sizes last longer than 2 months.

It was surprising to me in the way that I didn't realize just how much I had been storing the 3rd time around. After Matthew was born and we were sure (ha ha) that we were not having another kids, we gave everything away. When I found out that Robert was on the way, we scrambled to replace all of those items. And through the help of a lot of hand-me-downs from friends, we replaced everything pretty darn successfully. Which is why I was shocked, once again, at how it all accumulated so easily.

The family has also been blessed with the news that my cousin is expecting her first baby. This news came right before my Grandfather passed away - so I predict - a boy! Let's see if the theory of "when God takes one away he replaces it with another" holds true. So yeah!! Another baby in the family! What's better than that? Unfortunately this wee-one will be born in Japan so I have no idea when we'll all get our first visit with the expanding family.

And while she is kind enough to share the news of ultra-sounds, etc. with us, I have to fight an overwhelming urge to give assvice. I just keep thinking about when I was pregnant with Megan, all the firsts were so great but some of them were rather unexpected. And I remember thinking at times that "no one bothered to give me a heads up on this". Plus, now that I've been there and done that 3 times over, I often think back to the times Bill and I shared before the kids. I wish we'd made a point to do something special in those final months. Just the two of us. But the only thing that I can remember doing was enjoying a nice dinner out a chinese restaurant and joking about things were going to change soon. Hmph...had I really had a better idea, that dinner out would have been expanded to a little weekend getaway or something similar. Oh well... hind sight's 20/20, right?

And yesterday, I came across a few other items that I wanted to hand over to my niece. Some pregnancy books and an unused pregnancy test. I laid them on my desk, which happens to sit right inside the door from our garage so that I would remember to pack them all away with any other items that I came across and promptly forgot about it.

The kids and I went upstairs later that evening to get them showered and ready for bed when Bill came home from work. The look on his face as he tried to calmly inquire about "why I had a pregnancy test downstairs" was priceless.

No Bill, your 5th child is not on the way. You're a starter gun now, remember?

Update #2

While my brother was in the hospital, so was my Grandfather. As a 92 year old man, he was doing very well mentally but had begun having health issues a while back.

While he was admitted to the hospital for 3 days he was kept on oxygen and the original thought was that he would be allowed to return home but would most likely remain on the oxygen...forever. But after about two days, he came off and was doing well enough to have the oxygen sent home with him in the event that he needed it. We were told that his heart was weakening as well. In fact when he had had been hospitalized a few years prior he was told that he had about 4o-60% capacity. This time around...he was down to about 15%.

About a week after he was discharged he began experiencing pain and was taken to the hospital again. This time around he was told that there was nothing that they could do there that he couldn't do with the help of hospice from home. He was told that, at best, he had 6 months to live.

On the morning of March 19th, my Dad went to visit my grandparents and to install a type of "lift" for my Grandfather's recliner in order to help him get in/out of it with ease. He left the house around 12:30pm and a little while after that, the minister from my Grandparent's church stopped by for a visit. She said that she spent some time talking and praying with them both and because they had been unable to make the trip to mass that Sunday prior, she asked if they would like to receive communion. They agreed and no sooner had she given them communion when she said that a funny look came over my Grandfather's face. She asked him if he was ok, to which he replied, "no" and at that point she and my Grandmother decided to call hospice for assistance. A few moments later my Grandfather passed away. He was still sitting in his favorite recliner.

Norman Harold Adelsberger was 92 years old. He left behind my Grandmother whom he was married to for 69 years along with 3 children, 9 grand-children and 18 great-grandchildren. It was a small family but we shared a lot of love. We'll miss this wonderful, quiet man. But I know that he's in a better place, having lived a long and full life. I only hope that I can be so lucky some day.

Update #1

A while back I mentioned that my brother was diagnosed with colon cancer. A lot has happened since that time but I've not mentioned it since as it was and still is an ongoing battle for him.

Immediately after the tumor was found, his operation to remove it was scheduled for the following week. I stood by the phone that day in anticipation of any news that would come my way and sometime around noon I finally received word that he had made it out of surgery and was doing well. As I exhaled a sigh of relief for him making it past the first step in this process I began scheduling my trip back to PA in order to visit family that weekend.

Friday evening rolled around and I planned on picking up the kids, running home to finish packing the car, feed the kids, say goodby to Bill and hit the road by 6:30pm for the 5 hour drive ahead. Unfortunately after a phone call with a family member my plans were altered. Tests results from the tumor that was removed were delivered that day and the news wasn't good. There was cancer in 9 of 13 lymph nodes and he had stage 4 cancer.

I quickly placed a call to Bill at work with the news and he decided to head back with me as well. We both decided that if there was nothing else that we could do for him we at least wanted him to know that we were both there supporting every decision that he and my sister-in-law would be making and to give them our love and support along the way.

Dan was doing really well by the time we got to see him Saturday afternoon and was discharged the following day. The best that we could do for him was to deliver balloons to his room displaying just how much we loved him, in writing..."Congratulations on the sex change operation". (Can't lose your sense of humor through adversity, right?)

I also got a chance to visit with my Grandfather who had been in the hospital earlier that week as well with heart problems. All in all, it was a nice weekend. Far too quick as usual but it's always good to visit with everyone any chance I can get.

The weeks passed for Dan and other than a blood clot in his leg, he healed quickly. The best news of all came to us last week when it was determined that there was no cancer, anywhere, in his body. Take a minute to let that sink in...because remember earlier...stage 4 cancer!!??!!

To think that this was possible when the earlier diagnosis was delivered is by far the understatement of the year. Does anyone ever receive news like that after a stage 4 diagnosis? So whether the doctors did a fabulous job or there was help from a spiritual side is not for me to decide. All that I can say for sure is that I am so happy for him. The roller coaster ride that I'm sure he was on has leveled out to a steady ride of chemo treatments to ensure that any undetected cancer in his blood is eliminated has begun.

And while his fight is far from over, it's nice to know that he has fought hard and has won every round so far. He'll keep fighting hard too. I know he will because that's just who he is. His spirit, personality and upbeat attitude are something that I admire a lot. And I'm proud to call him my big brother.

Updates to come

I have so much to share since it's been....well forever since I last posted. But I don't have time right now. Highlights of what you can expect...

• Megan's 6th birthday
• Easter
• Grandfather's passing
• Cousin expecting
• New job
• Haircuts, teeth and crawling
• Brother Dan's good news - no wait...EXCELLENT news!

Our lives are sometimes way beyond normal, in fact can be quite boring at times, but it's all passing by so quickly these days. I know it's not all over the top, exciting stuff and that you won't all be sitting on your hands, holding your breath, just waiting for the moment that I hit the 'Publish Post' button, but these events have not only kept us quite busy but on our proverbial toes as well.

Post birthday post

Lucky for us, Matt is a kid who is pretty easy to please and entertain. This year however, his birthday wish was for a four-wheeler and a gun (nice, I know) and he was quite adamant about receiving these items. We tried on countless occassions to get different gift ideas out of him but he stuck to his guns...no pun intended...and continued to repeat the same wish list over and over. So we broke down and caved to the little shit.

We started the day out by letting him open up the smaller gift of the two...

And as I mentioned, because he's easy to please, he never thought twice about how this might be the only gift he was receiving. He was as happy as could be and off to the sitters he went that morning with the promise of birthday cake that evening.

When we arrived home, having no clue that something bigger and better was awaiting him, off he went to play while I emptied out diaper bags and back packs. A few minutes later he came into the kitchen with a funny look on his face as he announced the fact that he had found a "really huge present in the living room!" I know how badly he was itching to get his hands on that gift so I made him wait just long enough for Daddy to get home so that he could watch him open it as well.

No sooner did Bill walk through the door did Matt start tearing off the gift wrap on the coveted present...

(Yes, that's Christmas wrapping paper. So what? It's double

sided so only one side looked 'christmasy'.)

I wish that I had been able to get a picture that captured the happiness on this kid's face when he figured out what it was. After every stitch of wrapping paper was removed from the box, he proceeded to climb on top. After all...isn't that what you're supposed to do with a four wheeler?


We promised him we'd go out to dinner that evening so while I fed Robert, Bill opened up the box so that Matt could at least see the actual gift. Once it was out, he hopped on top again. Hey, who needs wheels and handle bars anyhow?

(Can you see the joy on this kid's face?)

So after dinner, we came home for some cake. Recognize this thing? Yes, it's the exact same God awful green smiley face cake that he picked out last year. (Honest, go back in the archives for those pics.) After that it was off to bed with the promise that we would put his four-wheeler together that evening after he was in bed and that he could ride it the next day when the battery was done charging.

Saturday dawns and with it comes torential downpours. Matt spent every available moment sitting on his ride and while watching the rain come down, he would occassionally look my way and tell me, "Mommy, I love my four-wheeler." Although we felt bad about the still charging battery, we felt worse about the weather outside.

(Can't you just feel the love?)

Finally! Around 4pm or so, the rain slowed down to a light drizzle and so we hauled the four wheeler outdoors so Matt could enjoy his new gift. And off he went...

Almost taking out the light post and stopping just short of my feet...

All in all, his 20 minutes spent outside before the rain came down again, was well spent. We brought it back inside for lack of a better storage spot for the time being and Matt spent the next hour wiping it down. The tires even got a good cleaning too!

The next day was the parade in New Haven for St. Patty's Day, which Matt still thinks is held for his birthday. We braved the 36 degree weather to sit on the street and watch a lot of drunk Irishmen and Irish-wanna-be's march up and down the street. A few hot chocolates and many full bladders later, we made our way back to Grandma's for his official birthday party with the family at which he made out like a bandit. It looked like Christmas all over again. But the funniest part of the day was the attempt that I made at making a fire truck cake for him. The concept was good but the final result left a lot to be desired. Bill said it looked like a bad Maco paint job. I think it looks like it got too close to a structure fire and began to melt. Oh well!

Sledding

Bill and the kids and I went out to a local golf course 2 weeks ago (boy am I late on posting) for a little fun on the hills.

They began with the hike up....


Which turned into a ride to the top via the Dad lift...

Megan started things off with a trip down the hill in what looked like the best available spot...

Little did we know that there was a man-made jump directly in her path. (If you squint really hard you can a patch of very white snow in front of her.) She hit it square and went flying face first down into the snow. But she was a trooper, much to our surprise, and she continued on...

Next it was Matt's turn. He has quite the sledding talent in that he can twist himself around on top of the sled while hurtling down the hill and never fall off of the darn thing...

But for as good as he was on the big hill, he preferred the little odd slopes along the way that as Bill said, allowed him more runs in less time...

It was a fun time for all, even Dad, who managed to squeeze his rear end onto the teeny tiny plastic disk 'wanna-be' sled...

#4 for Matt

Four years ago today was the beginning of life with Matthew. I guess I instinctively knew deep down that something was going to happen as the weekend approached (or perhaps it was just wishful thinking). As I said goodby to the front desk receptionist on my way out the door that afternoon I remember discussing with her how adamant I was that she would not see me walk back through that door the following Monday.

Friday evening was spent at the wake of a family friend and my emotions were running wild. We made our way through the slow moving receiving line and no matter how hard I tried, I could not contain my tears as I watched the family grieving. I waddled back outside to Bill stating the obvious that "I'm sure that didn't help the family" and me thinking that I would liked to have unloaded more than just my out of whack hormones on him for thinking I would have reacted that way on purpose.

Saturday brought more running around as Bryan was with us for the weekend and by the time early evening and dinner time rolled around I had been having some "leakage" that could no longer be ignored. When my water had broken with the Megan the first time around, I had an initial small gush but was later told that her head had dropped into the birth canal and essentially "plugged the hole". So this time around, because I had been leaking all day with the occasional gush that could not be contained with normal methods, I was aware that I would have to let my OBGYN know what was going on in order to avoid a dry birth. Unfortunately this meant a trip to the ER as the office was closed on the weekends. So off we went... Two hours later, we were sent home with no news but to wait it out.

The following morning brought more of the same but I began placing calls to my family in PA in case they wanted to get a jump start on the 5 hour drive to CT in order to be here for the birth.

Around 2-2:30pm, with Megan already down for her nap, I decided to take advantage of the quiet time and get some rest myself for I knew these opportunities would be few and far between before too long. And no sooner did I get comfortable on the bed did I feel the first indication of contractions.

If you've ever gone through labor before, you'll understand when I say, it took 2 more contractions before I was convinced that things were happening. So I crawled out of bed and went outside to let Bill know what was going on. He decided to take Bryan back home early so that wouldn't become an issue later on and I called back to PA again with the update. Mom and Dad decided to hit the road then for the drive up here. Little did they know that they should have heeded my advice from earlier in the morning as there was no way they were making it up here in time at this point.

Megan woke up shortly after that and we decided to go for a little walk around the neighborhood. The weather was absolutely beautiful that day and it seemed as though every neighbor was out enjoying it too. After attempting to hold a few conversations through contractions that were growing increasingly stronger, I gave up and headed back to the house to call my in-laws to come help with Megan. They lived about 4 blocks from us at the time but by the time they arrived, I could no longer talk through the contractions and Megan was definitely noticing that Mommy was not "feeling well" at this point. So my father-in-law took her back out for a walk and my mother-in-law picked up where I had left off on packing my hospital bag. (Yes, my due date wasn't for another 9 days, yes I had procastinated the 2nd time around.)

Sandy tried convincing me several times to call Bill and tell him we'd meet him at the hospital but I wanted to wait it out. By the time he walked through door (only about an hour after he left) my contractions were on top of each other and I all that I could think about was getting to the hospital. Oddly enough, he chose that time to brush his teeth and change his shirt... hhhhmmmm... good planning Bill!

Finally, we were off to the hospital for the 2nd time that weekend and luckily I was already registered due to my visit the night before. By the time we arrived, I could barely stand up throughout the contractions so Bill ran off to grab a wheelchair. As I waited on the curb, another contraction hit and as I doubled over, hands on my knees, while concentrating on breathing through it, a security guard approached me. His first mistake was that he opened his mouth. His second mistake was shouting out to my mother-in-law and me that "hey, you can't park here! This is for labor and delivery only!" To which I replied in the most eloquent way possible, "does it look like I'm standing here for my f*cking health?" Probably fearing for his own safety, he wisely backed off and at that same moment Bill appeared with a wheelchair and assistance from someone with admitting and I was whisked inside.

I knew that I was already in transition because I had been shaking from the time we arrived downstairs. As soon as we got to the room, I quickly changed into a hospital gown, crawled onto the bed, was examined by a mid-wife (whom, again, I did not know - throughout all of my appointments and with 2 pregnancies, I managed to once again be delivered by someone I had never met) and was advised to start pushing! Less than 10 minutes later, at 4:30pm, Matthew Cole Baker made his debut into the world at 6lbs 15oz, 19 1/2 inches long!

Happy Birthday Matthew! Your smiling face, crazy antics and funny sense of humor add so much to our family. We love you buddy!

Not good, but not horrible either

I've been a little preoccupied this week to think about posting anything worthwhile. (And I do have some fun pictures of the kids to post...but they'll just have to wait.) Between my head being in a whirl since finding out that my brother has colon cancer on Monday and with this the last week of the month, which means we're busy at working trying to wrap up invoicing to meet numbers, etc. there has been little time for me to think about anything beyond making it out of this week in one piece.

So, unfortunately yes, my brother was diagnosed with colon cancer. That's the bad news. The good news is that they removed the tumor on Wednesday morning after a 5 hour surgery and he is recovering well. The doctors believe that they removed everything but at this point are waiting for the pathology test results before determining a course of action on chemo/radiation.

So I'm heading back to PA tonight after work for a quick weekend visit. The 10 hour roundtrip drive will be well worth it to see my big brother and give him a hug. After all, if I've thought my week was bad, all I have to do is think about his and I'm once again reminded of how lucky I am.

Megan and Uncle Dan

Numbers

After receiving some disturbing news yesterday, I've been running a lot of numbers through my head in the past 24 hours and they're all adding up...much higher than I care to really think about.

4 co-workers who have each faced cancer battles within their families over the past 2 years. 3 lost their fight and as of last week, the remaining family member is searching for a reason to keep fighting.

1 babysitter, diagnosed with a tumor in the base of her skull. Treated, fought and won.

1 Aunt, who passed away from breast cancer back when I was very little. I still remember her wake being one of the first ones that I had ever attended. I had a cold that day that left me with a constant nagging cough. I distinctly remember sitting in the funeral parlor that evening while the rosary was being said and being so afraid that if I coughed I would once again be reminded to be quiet in that setting. It left me to the point where a blubbering noise would erupt when I could no longer restrain the urge. Yes, I admit that was a strange child.

1 Aunt and sister-in-law of very close family members diagnosed with cancer. Fought and won.

1 sister, diagnosed with cervical cancer about 5 years ago. Treated, fought and won.

1 Grandmother, passed away at a ripe old age, but not before being advised that her body was consumed with cancer throughout. Because of her age, no battle was fought.

1 Grandmother, cancerous tumor in her intestines. Surgery to remove the tumor as well as a part of her intestines, fought and won.

1 Father-in-law, diagnosed with a fast growing brain tumor a little over 1 year ago. Surgery performed immediately to remove as much as possible. Treatments began and with it so did the complications. He passed away on Feb 6, 2007.

1 Mother, goes for annual mammograms and each year we hold our breaths as they find significant lumps and run additional tests. Every year she dodges another bullet.

1 Sister-in-law, stood by her Mother when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Treated, fought and won. She also made it through a cancer scare with a mis-diagnosis on her Father.

These are just the people that I've watched go through this battle...there are so many more out there. Too many to count. Family members of friends who lost their battle with cancer before I ever knew them.

This year, my husband and kids, along with my Mother-in-law and a few other family members will be participating in the Relay for Life at Quinnipiac University. This year, we'll be remembering my Father-in-law and so many others who have been affected by this awful disease. This year, I'll be saying a prayer that the numbers on my list above do not go any higher.

But for today, tomorrow and the next, I'll be thinking of and saying prayers for my brother as we wait for test results, hoping for the best and preparing ourselves for worse. I don't feel like that preparation will really be enough... So I'll just keep thinking positive until then.

Little girl crushes

While Megan was perusing her Valentine cards last evening, she came across one with the picture of a High School Musical cast member on it. She turned it towards me and said, "Mommy, look."

I asked her what his name was, to which she replied in the most dreamy voice a 5 year old could muster, "Troy". And I swear there was an audible sigh at the end of that statement.

Yep - takes me back to the days of hanging posters on my bedrooms walls with pictures of Ralph Macchio, Corey Haim and Kirk Cameron on them. Could I have picked a geekier group of boys to worship?!

Happy Valentine's Day

******************SEE UPDATE AT BOTTOM*******************

This year marks the 10th Valentine's Day that Bill and I have celebrated together. We've never been the type to go overboard on the celebrations for this Halmark created holiday but we certainly never let the day go by unnoticed. And today I want to tell him how much I appreciate this.

Our first Valentine's together, back in 1999, was spent at the Melting Pot in Nashville, TN. We followed up the romantic dinner by taking in some blues music around the corner in Printers Alley and then ended it with a horse and carriage ride around town. I also remember that weekend consisting of take-out food, chocolate covered strawberries, and dare I admit it to everyone (oh what the heck), a sexy red outfit from Victoria's Secret of course. It was romantic, our relationship was still only one month 'new', and I remember that fuzzy feeling surrounding me as though nothing and no one else existed.

After I moved to CT, over the next couple of years we went out of our way to go out for dinner at romantic restaurants or we'd stay in for wonderful cooking at home. Bill always made sure to acknowledge the day in some way, shape or form. Even if it was just with a pretty, unassuming bouquet of flowers that he happened to pick up at Stop N Shop on his way home.

The kids have since become a part of our celebration and these days are spent helping them with kitty cat and Spider Man valentine cards. To add to this, while picking up heart lollipops for Megan to share with her class, Bill also made sure that each of the kids had a special card from Mom and Dad and their own little box of chocolate candies.

And yet this morning as I climbed into the car to take Matt and Robert to the sitters, I found a card hidden up on my sun visor. He once again found a quiet way to remind me that I am still his valentine.

Thank you Bill for making sure that although we both agreed long ago to not go crazy on this holiday, you never let it go by unnoticed. And most of all...thank you for loving me...every day.

**************************************UPDATE************************************

After posting this I received a call from our receptionist...regarding a delivery... I guess, considering he just blew every word out of the water up there about "unassuming bouquets and quiet reminders" I should add that he still knows how to keep me on my toes.

Today's the day - Let's go shopping ladies!!

IT'S AN ONLINE PURPLE DOOR JEWELRY PARTY!

Please join me today for my Purple Door E-Party for beautiful AFFORDABLE jewelry.

All that you need to do is log on to http://www.mypurpledoor.com/ and start shopping. Upon checking out, put my name (Lisa Baker) in the field that says: "Referred By/E-Party Hostess".

Each guest who orders $25.00 or more will receive a FREE pair of glass pearl earrings! And better yet...because today is Valentine's day, you can take advantage of The Purple Door's Valentine special of $5.00 off a purchase of $20.00 or more by putting the coupon code PDVAL08 in at checkout. AND (yes, there's more...can you believe it?) all orders of $50.00 or more will receive free shipping!

The Purple Door is a jewelry and accessories company offering fabulous, fun and AFFORDABLE jewelry and accessories.
Natural gemstones, Authentic austrian crystals, semi-precious stones, freshwater pearls, sterling silver, kids jewelry...there is something for just about everyone.
Best of all, nothing is more than $50.00 and most items are $30.00 or less. Really!

So log on to http://www.mypurpledoor.com/ and have fun shopping at your convenience.
Beautiful jewelry...fabulous prices... I hope you'll join me for some shopping fun!!!

My Purple Door E-Party:
http://www.mypurpledoor.com/

HOSTED BY: Lisa Baker

DATE: Thursday, February 14th (Valentine's Day)


The Purple Door
Where Girlfriends Love To Shop!
http://www.mypurpledoor.com/

It's an E-Party! Let's go shopping!

Browse now - but get ready to shop tomorrow! I'll include discount and code info in tomorrow's post:

YOU ARE INVITED TO A PURPLE DOOR JEWELRY PARTY!
AND IT'S ONLINE!
(Invite a friend!)

Please join me for my Purple Door E-Party for beautiful AFFORDABLE jewelry.
And you can stay in your pajamas if you want to~does it get much better than that?!

The Purple Door is a jewelry and accessories company offering fabulous, fun and AFFORDABLE jewelry and accessories.
Natural gemstones, Authentic austrian crystals, semi-precious stones, freshwater pearls, sterling silver, kids jewelry...there is something for just about everyone.
Best of all, nothing is more than $50.00 and most items are $30.00 or less. Really!

The party is tomorrow, Thursday, February 14th (Valentine's Day).
So log on to http://www.mypurpledoor.com/ and get ready to have fun shopping at your convenience.
Beautiful jewelry...fabulous prices... I hope you can join me for some shopping fun!!!


My Purple Door E-Party:
http://www.mypurpledoor.com/

HOSTED BY: Lisa Baker

DATE: Thursday, February 14th (Valentine's Day)



The Purple Door
Where Girlfriends Love To Shop!http://www.mypurpledoor.com/

Growing up Matthew style

I was tucking Matt into bed the other night and as I usually do, I leaned over his little body and propped myself up on my arm so we could sing our usual bedtime songs and end with fishy kisses. Matt began squirming a little and told me that his side was itching and hurting him. So I pulled his shirt up and decided that we'd put some lotion on it to help.

I grabbed the lotion out of the other room and when I came back into his bedroom he told me that Daddy had forgotten to put it on him after his shower, so we decided to load up all over instead of just that one spot. After putting the lotion on his torso and arms, I pulled his pj bottoms and underwear down to get to his legs and hiney. (Nothing worse than a dry, itchy hiney!) Matt was holding his shirt up and watching me apply the lotion when he informed me that his pee-pee was sticking out. (And just to clarify - not really "sticking out" but it was just there...and in his mind, sticking out.)

"But it doesn't stick out like Daddy's does," he says to me.

"And I don't have feavers like Daddy does eiver."

Poop, puke and so many other completely unnecessary things to discuss on a blog

If there is one sure fire way to kick start your weight loss plan, it's picking up a virus from one of your kids. Unfortunately, it's bound to end sooner or later and then willpower may have to take over.

It all started last Wednesday when the babysitter called to tell me that Robert had been unable to keep his breakfast down and that 3 very messy diapers later, he had diarhea on top of that. So I left work early to bring he and Matt home to begin what is so far 4+ days of sickness.

Because I've used up all but 4 days (actually 3 now) of my vacation time for the year (which is to last me until July!!) on the kids' sick days, Bill stayed home with Robert on Thursday. 3pm rolled around and I was beginning to feel a bit under the weather myself. Long story short, my 30 minute drive home felt like the longest drive ever with me barely make it home before losing it....literally.

My evening was spent sharing a "sick bed" with Robert, trying to hold down little sips of gingerale while trying to keep Robert hydrated with Pedialyte. By 1:30am my stomach had calmed down enough that I was only dealing with the southern end of the sickness...if you catch my drift. However, Bill, who was sleeping on the couch downstairs, was just beginning his bout around that time. Fortunately for him, there was no vomitting involved, and after a round of Imodium, he was off to work. Granted, a long drawn out day at work, but he was just slightly above the functioning mark.

Friday was spent home with the boys, waiting for what seemed like an inevitable moment that Matt would start up, and hoping to see the end for Robert. So far, both have not come. In fact, both Megan and Matt have seemed to avoid disaster. (Although with my luck, it will hit them on Monday and we'll be dealing with more missed time off from work.) Although, I guess with as much puke and poop that Bill and I dealt with there was no way that the two of us were coming away healthy.

And poor Robert is still having a tough time. Although "things" have slowed down, it's still very messy and definitely not something that you can wait too long to change. In fact, as soon as it is heard, we very carefully pick him up to move him to the changing area, hoping to avoid ruining another set of clothes.

We had also tried numerous times but he wanted nothing to do with solid foods until today. He's also picked up a slight gag reflex everytime he smells the Apple flavored Pedialyte and I can only attribute it to the fact that he was still getting sick when we were constantly pushing it down his throat to keep him hydrated. So after a slow start with some rice cereal and applesauce, I think we're finally on the mend. At the very least, I'm hoping that things become a little more bound up!

And in the mean time, the house has been sanatized and the Lysol hasn't left my hand. If we can keep the sick count down to 3 out of 5, we'll be in good shape. Keep your fingers crossed...

The Great Interview Experiment...part deux

The second part of the Neil's Great Interview Experiment took place with Mary Pat who interviewed me. (Poor thing!) I didn't give much thought to the process initially but when the introductions began with the pending questions looming, I began to wonder what in the world she could possibly manage to pull out of my blog that might be interview worthy.

Drum roll please!!!

Q - Blog questions! Why did you start blogging? Do you have any real life friends that blog? Do your friends and family read your blog? What does your husband think? When do you take time to blog?

A - My cousin Karen and her husband moved to Japan a little over a year and a half ago. In order to stay in touch with family and friends back here in the US, she started a blog (www.kimonokaren.blogspot.com). I started reading and then began exploring other sites and became addicted immediately. So I figured - why not give this a shot on my own in order to stay in touch with my out of state relatives. So many times I was left telling stories about the kids over and over again or intending to update the family on something happening in our lives and for one reason or another not get around to sharing it. Blogging just took care of that for me.

Although my friends and family read the blog, I get the impression that they aren't quite up to speed on the "etiquette" if you will, as the comments left behind on it are few and far between. It's obvious who understand the whole blogging thing and who doesn't.

In all honesty, I think my hubby thought that starting the blog was a little absurd (although he never said so). But now that I've been at it for a while, I know that he enjoys it and is constantly checking for updates. I've offered him the password to help out with posts but I still can't get him to take me up on that offer. Maybe if I give him free reign to post about the Red Sox or Notre Dame... Anyhow, although I have a long way to go before I'm anywhere near as good at blogging as some of my favorite reads are, I have definitely evolved over the past year. Now if I could just find more time...

Q - How did Uncle Kevin AKA Uncle Fat Kid get his name? What does he think about this nick name?

A - Ah, poor Kevin. (He's gonna strangle me for this one. He'll get over it.) Kevin has put on quite a bit of weight over the years. I'm told and from pictures that I've seen, he used to be an average sized 5'9" guy. Lot's of good food and numerous Bud Lights later...well let's just say he's not as svelte as he used to be! But he definitely has maintained his sense of humor about it all as he dubbed himself "Uncle Fat Kid" and continues to roll with it to this day.

Q - What in the heck happened with your house? It was built on a barite mine? How did you find this out? Is the barite worth anything? Does this effect the entire neighborhood?

A - Wow! I had forgotten that I had ever written about this issue. I could go on and on for quite a while on this one but I'll spare you the smaller details and will try to keep it to the point.

When my husband and bought our first house together back in 2001, although we wanted a niece sized piece of land, we really couldn't afford it. So we settled on a fantastic neighborhood, beautiful home - on a lot the size of a postage stamp.

Four years later, the housing market went through the roof and prices were almost double what they were before. We could finally afford that larger piece of land and so we went looking for our ideal home to raise the kids in. What we found was a little of 3/4 of an acre in the next town over. The house was ok, but definitely required some updating which I was looking forward to doing - starting with the kitchen and baths.

A month and half after we moved in, the Northeast was hit by some pretty severe rain storms that lasted for about a week and caused some major flood damage. We were lucky enough to have avoided any flooded but on the last day of the rain, we woke up to find a large gaping hole in our backyard that turned out to be a shaft to the barite mines. It was 10' off the back of my house, 15' in diameter and 35' deep!!!! I almost threw up the first time I approached the edge and looked down inside.

After much research we discovered that the town had mined for barite (a mineral that was used in white paint...unfortunately not worth anything today) back in the 1800's, shut down in the late 1800's but never closed the mines properly. They then proceeded to allow neighborhoods to be developed on this land.

We calculate that over 200 homes are affected by this along with some commercial property but the town of course denies having any part of it. We've tried so many different paths to get this resolved and continue to come up empty handed. So now we are caught up in a lovely little lawsuit with the town and the previous owners (who knew but still sold - no disclosure) that might not see the inside of a court room for another 2 years.

In the mean time, we've sunk $15,000 into closing the hole and are told that in order to fill the tunnels that run under our home and throughout our property, we're looking at around $500,000!!! (I don't know about anyone else's funds but that $15k blew out any thoughts of beginning renovations there and we certainly don't have access to $500k to fix the remaining issue.) And the ironic part of it all...we bought this place because of the LAND!!

Q - If you had it all over to do again would you go through the whole ear piercing thing with your daughter again? When did you get your ears pierced? How old were you? Who took you?

A - Oddly enough, although Megan gave us quite a ride that day, I would do it again in heart beat. The drama that she piles on to the every day thing can be very over the top. (Proven by the way that she cut off the dramatics less than a minute after walking out of the store after we completed ear #2.)

I on the other hand was not allowed to get my ears pierced until I was almost 16 years old. Just a silly old rule that was put into effect for my older sisters that still remained when it was my turn. I remember the year that I was finally permitted to get them pierced...one of my sisters was getting married that October (1990 to be exact!) and I begged and pleaded with my parents to let me get them pierced so I could wear real earrings for the wedding and not the crazy clip ons. They of course refused. However, just two months later, my Mom surprised me on a trip to the mall by telling me I was getting an early Christmas present and had them done then. What difference the extra two months made is beyond me.

Q - Have you noticed anything regarding Robert only having one kidney? Is he just as crazy as the other kids?

A - We found out that Robert had only one kidney during a routine ultrasound at my OBGYN office. We then began monthly visits to Yale so that they could monitor the development and begin testing for any other potential issues. Apparently having one kidney can be completely normal and even hereditary. Or it can be just one of numerous indications that there is something much more complex happening to the developing child. Although we don't know for sure if it's hereditary (I have both of my kidneys but my hubby hasn't been tested) it was determined that there were no underlying issues and the remaining kidney is fully functioning. And on the day that he was born, within two minutes, he had urinated twice - one time drenching the nurse.

Although we had been told prior to his birth that everything was fine, after seeing firsthand that everything was in working order, I think I finally released the breath that I had been unaware I was holding for the last few months.

There are no outward signs of the issue and in all actuality, he's an enormous child. Off the charts in fact. So it's not like it has affected his growth or eating in any way. His personality is not quite as nutty as the older kids and so far he seems very laid back and calm. He's still young though and I'm sure he'll be picking up some good stuff from Matt as he gets older and they begin playing together more often. So anything could change!!

Q - You have an entire week without family responsibilities. What do you do? Where do you go? Who do you take with you? (husband not allowed)

A - Hhhhmmm...no family, no husband...no worries, right? I would take my Mom and 3 sisters someplace warm. Someplace where we could just sit our rear ends on the beach, drink some fruity cocktails and let the sun soak into our bodies. And I'm not particular - it can be any beach. But it must be warm! (Can you tell that I'm tired of winter already?)

Q - You have won the lottery. It's an obscene amount of money. You have paid off all your debt, your families debt and secured trusts for your children and grandchildren. You still have a boatload of money left over? What do you do with it to indulge yourself?

A - The first thing I would do is get the F*%K out of the mine pit that we call home today. We've talked about moving south so we'd probably head to the Carolina's somewhere. I'd then take the entire family, mine and my husbands, on a vacation. Nothing over the top. In fact maybe we'd start out with Disney, for the kids who have never been, then head off to a mutually agreed upon spot that we would all enjoy. We'd probably head back to reality for a few months but then I'd make sure that my husband and I were able to take our dream vacation to Tahiti, Bora Bora, Morea and what the heck - we'd head to Fiji too. I'd also make sure that we were able to pick a vacation spot every year that would be traveled to with our kids and another every year for just he and I.

Beyond my grand vacation and home buying plans, as long as everything else was taken care of financially, I would just want to live a casual, laid back life where we could come and go however and whenever we wanted.

Q - I'm going to assume you have an iPod. If you don't then just play with me here. What is on your playlist? What are the top Lisa songs that mean something to you. Name as many as you like. Highlight one that is kind of a Lisa theme song.

A - My playlist depends on my mood. I can listen to any kind of music - except rap. I'm currently stuck on Michael Buble, some random jazz music and the soundtrack to A Lot Like Love. But that could change next month when I get into a country music kick. (Although that never lasts too long - just enough to get a fix.)

Anything can trigger the change; the mood I'm in, the weather that day, an upcoming concert that I'm anticipating going to (went through that phase with Billy Joel and Rod Stewart). I have a habit of playing my favorites over and over to the point where I still love them but can't stand listening to them anymore and have to take a much needed break.

Theme song? I've never really thought about that before. And the more I think of it now, I keep going back to the little ditty that Jack Black creates in the movie The Holiday for the Arthur Abbott character. Now I can't think of anything else except the piano music and the old man scaling the stairs at the end of the movie.

A - Do you read other people's blogs? If so what is your favorite blog?

Q - Like I said above, I've become addicted to blogs. My first real addiction was Amalah, which lead to MamaPop. From those spots I've expanded to: Silly Little Girl, All & Sundry, Not That You Asked, Whoorl, The Shape of a Mother and most recently, Autismville (over on Parents.com). I peruse others sporadically but I try to not get into them too much or my day would be spent reading blogs instead of working!

Q - What question were you hoping that I would ask that I didn't? Ask and answer please!

A - I can't say that I was anticipating anything in particular and in fact was wondering how anyone would be able to pull anything interesting out of my blog to ask about. However, you've asked some great questions and I've had a lot of fun answering them!

But if I have to add on here, how about blogging pet peeves? My two biggest pet peeves would be cyber trolls. It irritates me to no end how someone feels that they have to post negative comments and/or attack a blogger. It eats me up even further when it then turns into an attack on fellow commenters who defend the blogger or when it just continually gets hashed out over and over. Let's all stop feeding the troller egos and simply delete their inappropriate comments!

The second pet peeve would be lurkers. If you're kind enough to read the blog - leave an occasional comment. It gets a little lonely out here without knowing if anyone else is living on (or should I say visiting) the same island!!

So there you go. Perhaps this information won't spawn an entirely new group of people to begin cyber stalking me (as Bill likes to say) but for those of you who read me...I hope it was worth the few minutes out of your day!

Citizen of the Month's Great Interview Experiment

Neil Kramer, a writer from Los Angeles, came up with a nifty little idea that blossomed into a 359 (and counting) person interview experience. Take a looksie, sign up, or just read all of the interviews that have taken place so far.

This is a two part process in which you are interviewed by the person above you and then in turn you interview the person listed below you. I started out by interviewing Jeni Allen from TN. And while it was determined that I'll never be the next Barbara Walters, it was fun and fortunately my questions were sent during the height of the tornado invasion down south so I inadverdently helped take Jeni's mind off of the crazy weather around her. Here is our end result:

Q - I noticed that your blog looks relatively new, having started in September 2007. Is this your first and only blog? What got you started with blogging and inspires you to this day?

A - My current blog (Allen Family Circus) is my first and only blog. I started blogging as soon as I got my own laptop and my resident engineer set up a wireless network for our house. I've always loved to write, and to read, and I love to share what's going on in my life and in my head. My inspiration is primarily born of a desire for connection; SAHMs can feel pretty isolated, but I've found there are lots of us out there!

Q - James is quite obviously one of the loves of your life. Tell me what your first impression was of James when you first met.

A - Well, I thought he was nice enough, but kind of goofy. I don't remember our actual first meeting, but he does - he tells me his first thought was, "Jeff has a sister?" I think I didn't pay too much attention to him when we first met, because my best friend was interested in him. Then he asked me out and I started paying more attention. :-) And now, eleven years after that first date, I still think he's goofy, and I love it.

Q - Wendy would be love number 2 (not in order of preference but rather chronological!) - How did you break the news to James when you found out that you were expecting.

A - I'm pretty sure I just got his attention and showed him the test. He said, "Hmph." (I call that his "James noise." It's his initial response to almost everything.) We were both a little shocked - it was an intentional pregnancy, but we didn't think it would happen that quickly. James did not get as excited as I hoped, but in hindsight I see that it was the responsibility of having a baby that was tempering his enthusiasm. And now, to see him roll on the floor with a giggling Wendy, you'd think he had jumped up and down and yelled when he found out she was on the way.

Q - You've put in the time and effort to become a doctor/vet and in your own words have said that it was probably not the best choice for you. If you could do it all over again, what career path would you have pursued and do you still think that you would be a SAHM if you had followed that ambition?

A - If I had it to do over again, I would have stuck with either biology research or teaching. It would have saved about $100,000 in student loans, 6 years of intense stress, and quite a bit of strain on our marriage. I'm pretty sure I would be a SAHM in any case, but if I had chosen the other career path, we'd probably have at least 2 children now, instead of just Wendy. This decision is one that haunts me with what-ifs. Then I remember that if things HAD gone differently, Wendy would not be Wendy - so maybe things worked out for the best after all.

Q - Now that you're a SAHM, what is the most difficult thing for you to deal with that you never would have anticipated?

A - I've been surprised how lonely I feel sometimes. Because we moved right before Wendy was born, there wasn't time to form friendships before the busy-ness of having a newborn isolated us. My family lives in town, and that's great, but my heart aches for friends my age, especially those left behind in Columbia and Jefferson City, Missouri.

Q - From what I can read, you live in the Nashville area (I lived there too for a while, and that's where I met my hubby!). What's your favorite thing to do with the family around town.

A - Well, I'm embarrased to say that we've never done anything in Nashville. We've been here for a year and a half and haven't done a single, solitary thing, other than having Wendy at Vanderbilt. We live just far enough out of town for it to be kind of an excursion, and we just haven't taken the time. I would like to tour the Gaylord Opryland Hotel, go to the Zoo, and see what free stuff we can experience this summer. Really, even though we enjoy art, and music, and theater, we're homebodies.

Q - If there were no barriers and the sky was the limit (in terms of time, money, etc), what changes, if any, would you make in your life?

A - Wow...well, I would definitely pay off our debt, sell this house, and buy one that fits our lives better - you know, a house with closets. I would want to take James and Wendy my two favorite places I've lived, Anchorage, Alaska, and London, England. I would want to arrange things so that James had more leisure time. I'd go visit all of my friends several times a year, and have them visit me, too. And I might set some money aside for a mommy makeover after our family is complete. :-)

Q - And maybe this is too personal, so if you'd rather skip this one, feel free. Are you planning on expanding your family? What is your "ideal" family size?

A - I have always visualized our family with four children. Even as I type that it sounds crazy, since I have so much trouble keeping up with one. But four seems right. They may not all be our biological children; we talked about adoption years before we knew there might be a medical limit to my childbearing. To be surrounded by children, and later, hopefully, grandchildren, is one of my dreams - and to be old and alone, with no family, is one of my nightmares. We'll just have to see what the years bring.

Tune in tomorrow to read my interview given by Mary Pat!!

One Year

February 6, 2008 marks the one year anniversary since Bob passed away. A lot has happened this past year and not a day goes by that something doesn't remind us of why we loved him so much and just how much he is and will continue to be missed like crazy.

Robert resembles Bob from the wispy hairs on his head, to the similar baby pictures from Bob's childhood, down to the little chubby crooked pinky finger.

Matt not only talks about him constantly but continues to act like Grandpa in his carefree, crazy antics.

Every trip to Hamden is a reason for Megan to mention the trips to the convenience store where Grandpa would buy his hard rolls and a treat for her during the time he used to babysit for us.

And those same trips to Hamden always include a drive past the cemetery where he is buried and is cause for a chorus of "Hi Grandpa, hi Mimi, hi Grimpie! We love you and miss you!" to come from the back of the car from both kids. (And most recently, Matt has added a greeting to God in that grouping.)

Everyone in the family has dealt with this loss in different ways. Some moved past that moment in a steady gradual movement and others are continuing to struggle every day, looking for that happy or at least calm place in their lives again. But no matter how we've managed to move on or how far past the sadness we've pulled ourselves, his memories continue to stay with us.

Bob was always willing to lend a helping hand, and the way that he loved his family, his grandkids, the Red Sox and Notre Dame, can not be compared. He may not have been a perfect man or lived a perfect life, but he was about as passionate as they come. If he were here to tell you himself, I'm sure that he would agree that although he wasn't quite done, he managed to live a full life. And I thank my lucky stars every day that he was a part of mine.

Bowling - The New Contact Sport

We decided to take the kids bowling on Saturday to introduce a little something new in their lives. (And break up the monotony of our typical Saturday morning.) We went to a place right around the corner from the house that only offers duck pin bowling, which we figured would be perfect for the kids. Smaller balls + bumper lanes = easy handling and guaranteed scoring!

Before we even left the house, Megan started in with her typical, "I don't want to bowl" excuses and I figured we were doomed before we'd even begun. However, once she walked through the door her tune changed and surprisingly enough she was quite enthusiastic about it the entire time. (Perhaps the idea that she was able to wear new shoes helped the matter.)



Matt started us out, being that he is the youngest, and although he was coached by Daddy prior to rolling his first ball down the lane, he immediately adopted a style unique to himself. A little turn here and a little spin on your release and you too can be a duck pin master like Matt!

Megan stuck with the tried and proven technique of rolling between the legs but quickly proved herself to be as good a bowler as her Mommy. (Which is to say that we both stunk at this!) We both seemed to have decent enough techniques but there was something happening on our release that left us bouncing off of the bumpers. (Thank God for those bumpers!)

After a LONG and drawn out 10 frames we managed to make it through the game with only 3 melt downs. One was from Megan when she decided to hold onto the waiting balls while a return ball came barrelling up the shoot, smashing her fingers in between. (Even though we had told them both countless times to "get your fingers out of there!!") And twice from Matt. Once when an old crotchety man who evidently proclaimed himself the evil, duck pin, child terrorizer decided to yell at Matt for investigating the spot where the balls came out. And the second time when Megan smashed her finger and Matt arbitrarily decided to join his tears with hers.

Final scores? I don't remember exactly but I am a big enough person to admit that Matt beat me. Hey, back off! I still managed to kick Megan's butt!